some random thoughts about our future and direction

So Jay and I have been having continued conversations about us moving... and what to do... where we want to go, etc. I feel like we are getting closer to a decision.... but still have a long ways to go. Anyway when I was talking to Anna about things yesterday she had some very good points, that I have been pondering today.

• Jobs are temporal, more important than finding a job in a certain location is just deciding on a location that you want to be and will be happy.
  
• so I've been thinking about that alot today... Jay has suggested that we just move somewhere and then find a job when we get there. This thought has scared me a lot. I keep thinking we need to find a job and then move where the job is. But maybe the more important thing is to move somewhere we really want to be and then find a job when we get there. It is all about location.
• Maybe us finding this job was less about it being God's will and more about the fact the the place that Jay works is always hiring and is desperate to find people. Maybe that's why they sought us out. Not because it was necessarily God's will for us to come here, but just because they needed an employee.
  

Well I gotta go make dinner, but those are two of my random thoughts.

Patience is a virture (just not one of mine)

So I wrote before about us moving soon. Well I know it hasn't been very long, but the impatient part of me is getting tired of waiting.

Its funny because I am normally a very impatient person (to a fault sometimes) and so when I have an idea I'm the kind of person who will run right out and do what ever it is that I wanted to do (or at least start planning it). If I don't do it right away my excitement runs out and I just don't end up doing it at all. I also feel that my outlook on life is generally optimistic. I normally feel very positive about being able to accomplish goals and I jump right into making plans. My husband on the other hand is what I call the eternal pessimist. (He would say he is more of a realist - but either way he doesn't share my optimistic view of things.) (love ya hon) He is normally a wait and see kind of person. If we have an idea he doesn't let himself get excited about it and normally just says lets wait and see what happens. Well this whole moving situation has been totally different. After a long heart to heart talk about things, we both decided that it was really time to move. I just figured we would start applying for jobs and see what happened. But instead Jay started getting really excited about moving and constantly talking about it (how very Lori of him). I tried to take on his roll of lets see what happens, but when the eternal realist/ pessimist is sitting there telling me that we should start packing (which we have) its really hard to not get excited myself (being the impatient optimist that I normally am). So we (read I) have done quite a bit of packing so far (most of the non essentials that we won't miss if they are packed for 6 months or so) and now we still have no job. We have had a few leads and still have one currently, but other than that we are kind just sitting still. So now Jay and I are both really anxious to get out of here and have an office full of boxes :) but still nowhere to go. Anyway I just think its funny that I've been trying to be the realist in the situation and Jay has totally taken on my roll. Its a good thing that we normally balance each other out, because I would hate to see what would have happened if I had married someone more like myself in these regards. I guess its good that opposities really do attract. Well hopefully we will find out about the job in NY soon and/ or find another job so we can get out of Arkansas.

Disappoint is looming near

So Jay and I have been job hunting. We finally decided that it is time to leave Arkansas!!! The whole thing was started by a conversation about us needing to be close to family and stuff for the kids sake. We started talking about moving up to Iowa for a few years to be around my familiy before we permenately moved up to New York where Jay's family is. We have been talking about things for a couple of weeks, and have already applied for a couple of jobs. We are applying in both Iowa and New York for now. Well we were leaning towards moving to Iowa for a while, but it just seems like those doors keep closing. But not even just closing clearly shut, but they close, then open then seem like they are open but then close again. Its like God is teasing me with moving to Iowa. I am so frustrated right now. We still don't have a decision made as to where we are going, but doors are definately more open in New York at this point then they are in Iowa. Why is me wanting to be around my family for a few years such a bad or impossible thing. Why are we going to end up in New York around Jay's family and not mine (no offense to any of Jay's family who are readin this. Its not anything against you guys - I just want to be around my family for awhile). Why does it seem that my desire to live in Iowa is never going to happen. Why do I feel like I am wishing for something impossible. I feel like right now I might as well be saying I want to go on a cruise or a trip to Italy, cause it seem just about as likely right now. What is so wrong with being around my family. And even if it isn't what God has for us, why does it seem like He has totally been teasing me with the desire to do so and then saying no. Why let me dream. Why not let me just be miserable here instead with no hopes and no expectation for the future. Why let me have dreams anyway. Why?? I guess I should know better than to dream.

My great money idea

So I think I'm cool cause I've been reading all kind of Financial blogs lately cause we are finally going to open up an IRA with some of our tax returm. In the process I have found a bunch of other useful financial information. One thing that I keep reading about on the blogs is creating a price book which is basically a list of your normal grocery and house hold purchases and their prices so you know when you are at another store if a sale is really a good idea. You are also supposed to put typical sale prices in the book so you can know the lowest price an item will be that you frequently buy and stock up on during sales. Well I finally decided to start making one of these (I'm in the process of putting prices into an Excel spreadsheet and then I'll play with it from there - I just sat down with my last two weeks of grocery receipts to get started with prices and what we normally buy. This is going to be a really big task, to actually get all the prices in there and set it up in a useable fashion, but I really think it will pay off. We were just recenly at a store we don't normally shop at and saw some things that appeared to be cheaper than they were at walmart and now I know that if I had a price book in my purse I would have know what things were a good deal and what things weren't.
I've really been trying to make a budget and stick to it and since we don't have a lot of things that I can cut back on (we are going to be switching to a prepaid cell phone instead of my $50 a month plan I have right now), but really groceries are the best place for me to cut. So I've been setting us a strict limit each week and trying really hard to stick to it. Sometimes it works sometimes I am shocked when the checker rings up my total. Well I had a brilliant idea (or at least I think its brilliant) that once I get my price book all set up in excel and start making my grocery list from it I can know how much we will spend at the grocery store before I get that shocking total from the cashier. So I'm planning on getting this all set up soon and then I can know what I will spend and decide what we can stock up on or what we need to do without that week while I'm still at home instead of trying to figure out a running total at the store while I shop. So that was my big idea and I'm excited to try it out.
I'm also excited cause as soon as our tax return gets here (we are hoping to file tonight) we can pay off our discover card and actually be ahead a month instead of always being behind. (We basically put all our expenses on the discover card each month and then pay it off at the next bill cycle, but it is always stressful when the bill comes cause we always spend more than we should. Now we will pay for things out of the checking account and if we don't have the money we can't buy it, instead of just putting it on the card and worrying about how to pay for it when the bill comes.

Anyway I'm excited about getting our finances in line and actually controlling them rather than them controlling us!

We are going on a limo ride tomorrow!

So Jay and I are going on our first ever limo ride tomorrow for Valentines Day!! I'm so excited. We found an ad in our local paper for a February Special from a limo company that includes a limo ride and dinner for 2 at a local steak house. All this for $85. It seems like a crazy amount to pay for dinner (even if it is for valentines day) but I think it will be fun. I still can't believe that they weren't booked up (the weekend before valentines day), but it is a small town. Hopefully it will be worth it, makes me a little nervouse that when we called he said I could choose any time I wanted to. Does everyone else know something we don't? None the less this girl who gives her husband a strict lecture about not buying roses on valentines day because they are way over priced is going on a limo ride and having a steak dinner for $85! We deserve it! And the kids have been super crazy, so its way worth it to get out of the house with out them. Jay's sister will be here watching the kids so we don't have to worry about them. Yay! We are getting really dressed up and everything! This is the first year since we had kids that we are actually getting to actually go out on valentines day!! I'll post later to let you know how the evening was.

Anna's Scrapbook Goals for the week :)

So I figured since Anna has been bugging me about blogging lately and since Anna & I were talking about how she can get noticed in the scrapbooking world (and even start her own product line)... I would post some blogs here for Anna to check out and contact these people. So Anna your homework for the week is to contact one of the people from these blogs and start picking their brains. Find out how they got started in the industry, how to start designing and marketing products, copy righting ideas, and any other questions you have. You also have to let me know what you find out... and last but not least when you become famous you can give your best friend credit for kick starting your career.

Little Davis Designs Blog

Karen Russel's Blog

Rhonna Farrer's Blog
check out specifically the post from Jan. 5th

Courtney Walsh's Blog - she is on the Chatterbox design team (and she is a music pastor's wife)

The one who won the Hero Arts contest & she is a Basic Grey Guest Designer

You should ask this person if she is in need of a guest desinger or anything :)

ok... so that should keep you busy for a little while. Happy homework. :)

Birth control and Biblical times

Ok so I was reading in Genesis yesterday and it really got me thinking about birth control and how much we really take control away from God in this area. Something that really got me thinking was the comment that Rachel made to Jacob about why he hadn't given her a child. Jacob's responsse was "Am I in the place of God, who has kept you from having children" For some reason this made me think alot about children and how we as a society have basically taken on the responsibility of deciding how many children we have. We have even started to explore the options of choosing the gender of our children when we do decide to have them. Jay and I had a big discussion about this last night, and I'm still not sure how exactly I feel and what my responsibility as a Christian really is in this matter. By using birth control am I really playing god in my own life. What if God wants a person to have a big family, and the parents only choose to have one. Are these people simply missing out on a blessing from God (its says in the Bible that children are a blessing from God) or are they actually prohibiting God's work on the earth... I know that God allows us to have free choice, and if we won't do something for Him, he will find someone else who will, but.... I'm just not sure... What if we decide to have 4 kids but God planned for us to be a familly of 5 or 6 (or for Jay's sake a family of 7 kids) are we somehow thwarting God's plans. What if our 5th child would have been a preacher or some other major player in the kingdom of God and we stop at 4 kids. Or maybe God only wants us to have 4 kids and we just get lucky in our planning. Also so many christians are opposed to the morning after pill, but don't think twice about using the birth control pill which can also cause abortions. We want God to direct us, but we also want control of our own plans. It's like we say God I want you to work in my life, but this is how it should be done. He may allow us to have things our way, but is it really the best, or just Him allowing us to have things the way we think we want them. ... ok so this post is completely rambling and not really following any real train of thought (guess I've been out of the practice of writing papers for seminary too long). :) Well anyway I would love to hear your thoughts on these things (all like 2 people who actually read my blog). :)

Long time - no blog

So its official I'm just a bad blogger. I'm just not one of those update your blog every day type of people (I guess since my last post was the beginning of December, I'm barely an update your blog once a month type of person) :) Its so funny because I love reading other peoples blogs, but I just can't get my self to comment, or update my own. Probably because my main online time is with one or both kids in my lap or nursing the younger one. I just don't get much time to myself, or even much time when my arms aren't full of one of the kids.. so when I do have a few minutes, I just don't blog. So here you go Anna and Deb I'm updating my blog... just for you guys. :)